Friday, 25 December 2009
I had long forgotten who I was or what the materialization of my body looked like, I was only here. If I were given a choice, I probably wouldn’t have picked such a place to be born. Without a mouth I could not speak, without eyes I could not cry, without a will I could not live, and yet I was conscious.
“Am I alive? Do I exist?” I would ask myself, as my body was crushed, thrown and manipulated into different shapes and sizes yet I could not suffer. I was envious; I envy those who lived each day with unlimited goals and ambition. While death was my single goal, to achieve it then leave this world is the only purpose I have.
It became dark, my body hardened and cracked as water evaporated. The countless chemical reactions occurred within my host expanded the body.
A group of people watched me with their mouths gaping as I become the fruits of their efforts. This is it, my life is about to end. These individuals who go through each day living with unlimited purposes in this vast world which I am about to leave.
A feeling… what is this feeling? Accomplishment? Joy? My only purpose in life is death which is now moments away made me realize that I do not envy those who have limitless goals. I have no knowledge of any other purpose nor do I have the ability to acknowledge them left me with one goal and the feeling of being able to accomplish it is unimaginable! Humans chained by knowledge seek the possibilities of this world, thus carry the burden of their dreams. Every goal they achieve can only bring forth a fraction of enjoyment because there is so much more goals ahead, even on their death bed they are filled with regret and things they wished they could have done. One may feel satisfied with what has already been achieved but there is always regret.
With unlimited ambition, you sacrifice the greatest satisfaction.
To live life with a single purpose, to achieve it without regret and to honestly feel that there is no desire to continue on with life.
I pity those who lack such an existence.